a2zmom

I hope all of you who are celebrating had a lovely holiday.

I hope all those who celebrated had a lovely and delicious sedar.

This year my sister made homemade matzoh! Plus Aaron was albe to come in. So, all in all, a great time was had.

I've been basically off LJ for the last 2 weeks due to work. Which is sad. I even wound up working all weekend. But enough of that.

( Here are my reactions to Bones after a long hiatus. )

Pre-series

Someone

She is no one.

She is an indentured servant and can neither read nor write.

She is a princess, promised to a man she's never met.

She is a nurse because she isn't allowed to become a doctor.

She is G-d fearing; she is an atheist, she is a tom-boy, she is sugar-and-spice, she is a cheerleader. She has always been on the margins.

She is no one.

After the power rolls through her, she understands – becoming humanity's savior didn't make her someone. She was choosen because she already was someone. The world just didn't want to acknowledge it.


AN. I think the current political scene has gotten to me.

For those of you who are new to this journal, every year on this day I do a special post in rememberance of my first born child, Benjamin. He only lived for seven and a half weks, all of it was painful and awful and sad. You can read about his life here, if you wish.

Today's post is about letting go, of both the dead and the living.

First, some thoughts about grief. I don't think there's a correct way to grieve. Some are very private. That tended to be me. I did most of my crying going back and forth to work, sitting on a bus. Some are much more open and sharing of their emotions. Eventually, the majority of us move on and start living our lives again. Some see that as a betrayal, especially if it's a spouse that has died.

My husband's unclce is 88 and very ill. His wife is 86. They been together over 60 years. I don't think anyone expects her to survive much past his death. But she does have a lot to live for - 4 children, 17 grandchildren, 4 great-grandchildren and 2 more on the way.But no one thinks she'll be able to let go once he's gone. Is that wrong of her? I don't know; it's not for me to say.

Most of us do go on though, As humans we have an amazing capacity to endure emotional pain and come out on the other side. It doesn't mean we aren't changed by the experience but we do find joy again.

I think in many ways its harder to let go of the living. I see it all the time - parents who refuse to give their kids the independence they need in order to grow up.

My oldest graduated college in December. He is living with a bunch of other people in a house in Boston and he has a full time job. I speak to him evry couple of weeks and he comes back to NJ just a few times a year. People are really suprised that I'm not upset by this. I'm not. When we talk, it's always for an hour or so and I think we're very close. But he's now a grown-up and he leads his own life now.

My youngest is now in college. Someone else in my office sent her son to college in the same city. She's gone down most weeknds to see him. I went on parent's weekend, but that's it. Am I right and she's wrong? I wouldn't say that. But for me and my style of parenting, my kids would have been horrified if I kept showing up.

I place a lot of value on my kids being independent. That doesn't mean that I amd my husband aren't there to help. Both my kids know that that can always call for advice. But that also have confidence that most of the time, they can get by on thei own.

This post is a much bigger ramble than I intended. I'll end by saying that while it isn't easy to let go, it's something we all wind up doing.

1.

In Virginia, a bill will likely pass that forces to get an external ultrasound prior to obtaining an abortion. In the majority of cases, this translates to a highly invasive internal ultrasound probe since that is the only way to show the fetal organs and heartbeat.

The governor claims "Virginia will have a strong women's right-to-know bill, to provide the information necessary to make a fully informed decision."

Because a woman seeking an abortion is so stupid that she actually doesn't know that there is a fetus in there.

Mississippi, Pennslyvania and Alabana are all pushing versions of this bill.

Here is a Doonesbury cartoon that was published today on the issue.

2.

Texas basically has had all its funding cut for women's health care services to the poor. A law was based that no state funds can be used to fund any clinic that performs abortion abortion services - i.e. Planned PArenthood. The federal government as a result refuses to send any funds to Texas state program that which provides Medicaid waivers for women who don’t qualify for actual Medicaid (and which provides more than 100,000 low- or no-income women with basic women’s health services, including birth control) would lose all federal funding, which currently covers about 90% of the $40 million it takes to run the program. Because, according to a state law that Texas has already enacted, the funding it’s been receiving isn’t legal.

Read more here

Bottom line - if you're poor, you don't get preventative care. Period.


3.

In Oaklahoma, doctors are now allowed to lie to their patients if the baby they are carrying is defective. Because hey, if the truth was known, they might want to abort it. And we can't have that.


Here's something you might find cathartic:

F*ck the Narrative by Kita.

Finally, if anyone out there - friend, friend of friend, someone who wandered by - finds any of the things I've listed as good laws, I'd love to understand your reasoning. Because all I see is women being told that they don't know what's best for themselves and that's unacceptable imo.

Zachary came home last night (more on that shortly) and he brought me a present - a map of everything Brice Springsteen. Every New Jerseyish place, person or thing mentioned in a song has been meticuously mapped out. For a fan (like me), it's way cool and as an example of graphic art, stellar.

Here's a bit of it. It was designed by Dan Casaro and comes with this humerous warning: Springstreets is not to scale and should not be used while on a drive, last chance power or otherwise. The only thing you can really use this map to find is yourself.

Spike, pre-series

Fast Food

Smoke break was almost over. She wished she could quit; she wasn't sure the tips was worth the leering and the groping. Plus that one guy gave her the creeps.
Said creep was suddenly in front of her, blocking the door.

"I'm feeling a bit peckish. What do you say, luv?"

She shuddered. "I am not sleeping with you, jackass."

He smirked, his teeth suddenly looking sharper. "Didn't mean sex."

Five minutes later, he stepped over the still warm body. Normally, he preferred to linger over his meals a bit but Dru was waiting, so in and out it was.

This article was recently on the front page of Northeastern University's homepage. It details the senior thesis project Aaon and the rest of his team created last semester. The article is fascinating, but the short version is they built a robotic glove that will enable stroke victims to regain fine motor control.

Sadly, since Aaron finished school in December he wasn't interviewed for the article but another member of the team was along with the graduate student who guided them.